Only when it is the darkest we can see the stars : Suicide isn’t the remedy.

I’m sure none of us can forget the “I Quit” scene from 3 Idiots. It rang a bell close to the hearts of many of our younger population who have felt pressurized at some point or the other in life. Each year, between 30 and 40 people per 100,000 Indians aged between 15 and 29 kill themselves. This accounts for about a third of all suicides in the country.Reports also say that parental / societal pressure to score well in boards / high level entrance exams is one of the major causes behind this staggeringly high figure. Who is to be blamed here? The system or the individual? Sure we would like to say “the system” because who wants to die right? But the truth is – it takes two to tango.

I am not blaming the deceased. They have my deepest sympathies and I wish their lives would have been easier, they had been more loved and understood by their family and friends and they had more freedom in their lives to pursue their dreams. I wish they had found the right support at the right time. But I also wish that we all develop more strength of character.

A kid asked her father, “Papa why do people commit suicide? It would have taken so much courage to hurt your own self na?” Her father replied, “No dear! It takes more courage to live. Suicide does not mean that the person was weak. But they choose to give in to their moment of weakness. Suicide is not a brave act. And don’t ever think about it!”

I am sure that child will always find the courage to keep going in life 

As a motivational speaker for the youth, I have had the opportunity to interact with thousands of college students during fests and workshops and seminars. These institutions are buzzing with dreams, if only one could hear them. I would say to all those kids who are out there, in this big bad world, trying to make something of themselves – your pathways are under construction. You may trip and fall on some rough edges from time to time. Don’t take yourself off the road for that reason.

If you need to talk to someone, go to your family. Or a dear friend. I have seen people wilting inside because they are too scared to share their fears and sorrows. Please don’t do it. There is no harm in seeking help from someone who has more experience and wisdom. If not family, go to a teacher. Write to me if I can help you. I try to help as many who reach out to me. And many more through my blogs and events. But the trials and tribulations should be no reason to take you down. It is when the going gets tough, that the tough get going. You too, get going.

Besides, what do you gain by ending your life? When people seek an end to their pain by ending their life – the life no longer remains to be enjoyed. And the real question is – you take your life from whom? Your death really is something that happens to everyone around you – and not you. You leave behind pieces that take years to be picked up. Why make your loved ones go through all the pain and turmoil for a situation that will change itself sooner, if not later. Life is like a sin curve. Have you seen one? Crests and troughs – they keep coming at regular intervals. If your joy is not permanent, how can your pain be?
I know I am asking too many questions. Here is an answer for you.

When you feel you are too depressed to handle life, and that everything is falling apart, just do this small test. Grab your nose tightly and don’t breathe. You will see that after a few seconds, no matter how much you want, your brain will tell you “shut up and breathe you moron”. Even in your worst most catastrophic days, when you put your hand on your chest, you can feel your heart beating.
That is the surest sign that your life is left to be lived. Your body wants to live, despite everything your brain is telling you. What is it that you cannot handle? Unemployment, heartbreak, loss of a loved one, an extreme wrong-doing to you?

At any given point in life, you can turn yourself around. If you have reached rock-bottom, you make it your solid ground. If you think you have reached the worst point in your life – what more could happen! You move ahead from there. And if you think there is still something to lose – then you work your ass off to ensure it does not go down south from there!

In either of the cases, your beating heart will show you the light. When people are thoroughly depressed, the first thing they need is hope. The second is confidence. If you have decided to end your life, can you just halt your plans a little and try to live more? If life becomes too much for you – take a break. Even if you have decided to end it, take a break. Go on a vacation. Go someplace different where you don’t know anyone and anything.
You will be surprised at how much this can help! When there is no one to shout in your ears that you are a failure, when there is no pressure to conform, you will see both hope and confidence coming back. In those moments when you do not expect anything from life, you find yourself truly. You do not have to follow the bandwagon and get on the bus which everyone is taking. There is so much to do in life! If something has not worked out today, something else will work out tomorrow, provided you be a little smart about it.

If I have to narrow it down – the two major reasons behind suicides are – people believing they have to conform and people believing their failure is the end of their world. If you can fight these two demonic thoughts, you will have more confidence in your pursuits, even the failed ones.

Life never gives you more than what you can handle. Because you always have the power to change your situation. Or how you see yourself in that situation. It is one life. None of us are getting out alive anyway!

Article by- Akash Gautam

Akash Gautam is one of the most sought after & popular Motivational Speakers in India, Dubai & Singapore. His pioneering work as a Keynote Speaker over the past 16 years has seen him speak at India’s Top Corporates in cities like Mumbai, Delhi, Bengaluru, Hyderabad, Pune and Kolkata. His Corporate Events & Youth Events are very popular amongst audiences because of sarcasm, humor & story telling. You may know much more about him at:-  http://akashgautam.com/motivational-speakers-in-india/

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